It’s hotter than Hotter Than July out and you need music for your trip to the beach. What mixtape are you gonna hook-up in the car? Look people, THIS IS NO TIME FOR ART or anything remotely modern. It’s time to go straight forward full on. Here is your guide, not approved by Glass Rock.
1. Roger-So Ruff So Tuff: Why not make it hotter than it already is? You are ruff and tuff enough. Believe.
2. AC/DC-Flick of the Switch: If anyone in the car asks you to turn this off, turn it down, or “why?” (dumbest question ever) immediately threaten to drive into the median and ruin everyone’s day. Follow through on your threat if this persists.
3. Tall Firs-Hairdo: How did this get in here? (not approved by Tall Firs)
4. ZZ Top-Precious and Grace: If anyone in the car asks you to turn this off, turn it down, or “why?” (dumbest question ever) immediately say, “Cuz this song is cool as sh*t.” See number 2 if grumbling continues.
5. Wire-the 15th: Okay, maybe a little ART.
6. Glass Rock-Runaway: The fans demanded this one. (approved by Glass Rock)
7. Egyptian Lover-Egypt Egypt: To a paraphrase a famous apocryphal jazz paraphrase, If [i] have to explain this to you, you’ll never understand.
8. Soft Location-Diamonds and Gems: How did this get in here? (approved by Soft Location)
9. Mudhoney-Dicks Hate the Police: Say goodbye to those pests in your rearview.